Ruining my Day

Mkay, right, 2 posts in one day. Haven't done that in ages.But something this morning has upset me and I need to vent before I can move on.

I absolutely hate it when someone makes you feel guilty even tho you are not in the wrong, they are.

Okay, so that is a bit of a sweeping statement. And perhaps some of you can rise above it and it doesn't leave you feeling awful, but unfortunately, no matter how in the right I am, other people can still make me feel bad and I hate it. Not bad as in I think I did anything wrong, but bad as in leaving me with a horrible feeling, I can't quite explain it properly. And angry because of how they've reacted.

So here are some examples to help you. The one I can remember very clearly is not letting someone in front of me in traffic in a particular spot where the traffic queues every morning. Many people try to jump in just before the highway onramp because there is such a queue. But I don't let people in. Buddy, I've been queuing here, what is so special about you that you shouldn't have to too? Also, it's all very well thinking to yourself well what is one extra car in this long queue going to make to me. Honestly, nothing. But to the guy who just joined the back of the queue, there are at least 10 (definitely more by the time he gets to the front) cars slowing down his progress. And that is where I think the inconsideration lies. So, I don't let people in. I didn't let this one guy in and he promptly got in behind me and continued to pull the finger at me for a continued stretch all the way onto the highway. I mean really. And yes, it made me so annoyed and ruin my morning. And I was NOT the one trying to jump the traffic queue.

This morning it happened again. I placed an order on Bid or Buy on the 17th May and promptly did an eft for the full amount including delivery. On the 21st after no feedback whatsoever I mailed them asking when my product would be delivered (because I know there is a postal strike on, but I wanted to know if it had even been posted yet!). The guy phoned me back to say the order had slipped thru the cracks and so sorry he hadn't seen it yet. But they didn't have stock of what I'd ordered (so why are you listing it then??) did I want a replacement. He clearly wanted me to take the replacement and at the same price. I'd ordered a curtain of fairy lights 2m x 2m. He wanted to replace this with a 4m string. They sell 20m strings for even less than I'd paid. And he was willing to deliver them to me. And if they didn't suit my purpose I could return them. Urgh. This all sounded like too much hassle to me and after discovering I certainly wouldn't be getting my money's worth, I decided I wanted a refund. And (I thought at this point) if I couldn't find what I wanted by end of July, when he was getting more stock, I'd be in touch. On the 24th I mailed him with my decision and banking details.

So anyway last Monday I phoned him again to ask when he'd be refunding me. Don't worry, he says, it'll happen this week. Okay fine I say. Last Friday I phone again. It'll definitely be done on Friday or Saturday he says. He (who knows why) wants to go into a branch and do it. And I'll be notified immediately.

So this morning, I check my bank account and it's still not there. Bid Or Buy was mailing me asking for to rate the seller and on the weekend I'd already decided that was probably the only way to get my refund. So this morning I put the experience as a negative rating (well it has been!!) And said truthfully that they hadn't had stock of the item I ordered and I was still waiting for over a week for my refund.

Boy, it didn't take long before I got a phone call from him asking why I'd given him a negative rating. Seriously? Oh but he's been trying to find the lights for me, he says. Well you never once said that to me, instead you promised payment more than once and never met your own deadlines. I can only trust someone I don't know so many times :P

So let's hope that as he said I'll be refunded today. Until the money is in my account, his negative rating stands (I said I'd change it after I was refunded).

I mean really. How can he claim offense and make me feel bad when I've been nothing but honest, because this has been a negative experience. If only I'd just found the lights in a shop, been able to go to the check-out and take my item home with me there and then.

Urgh. Let's hope the week improves from here!

Winter Weekend

Wow, a weekend with not much to report at all. We were very lazy and aside from a shopping excursion to Woodmead on Saturday (after a very late wake up!) and an afternoon at Gilroy's on Sunday with some friends, we barely left the house.

We made some delish nacho's for dinner on Saturday evening. And I made crumpets for breakfast on Sunday (after I'd cleaned the bunny-hutch and done some grocery shopping while The Trucker was playing a very early cricket game).

All in all, it was definitely a weekend we needed. You know one of those bundled-up winter ones with the heater on (omg I am loving having the little gas heater!) in front of the TV (We have now finished Spartacus: Blood & Sand ... he is re-watching it with me cause I'd never seen it).

We also watched Real Steel. Which was more entertaining than I thought it'd be :)

So yes, very boring, I know ;)

Chilly Philly

Brrr. It has been chilly this week. Luckily The Trucker brought over his little gas heater this week (YAY!) since his sister had another in storage that they can use.

Other than that, what have I been up to? The Trucker came over on Wednesday evening (with the heater) and made dinner. I love when he makes dinner. I know they say anything someone else always taste better but seriously, the boy can do no wrong in the kitchen. I guess because I have too-high expectations of myself and I know what goes into it when I cook that it never seems as good to me?

And then last night @jarredcinman came over for a catch-up. Was an awesome evening with gluhwein and veggie burgers and long conversations about everything. I love these evenings.

Don't have much planned for this weekend. Oh, but I did get bedside tables this week. Nothing too fancy since everything I've seen costs R1500 and up! For bedside tables ?!? I ended up going and buying 2 B-Cubes from Mistry's (basically a square frame with a shelf in the middle), which were the perfect size and had them stained to match my 4-poster bed. OMG I am so thrilled with them :) And all for < R300 each!

My 5 Cents

So it's been a pretty quiet week. On Monday eve I went and hung out at The Trucker's ... we were both still feeling pretty miserable :( And last night I went to a Lola Montez Champagne & Caviar Sensual Safari evening organised by @WhizBangLouLou. It was really interesting to chat & meet the owner in a nice cosy environment, and there was champagne & caviar so that was good ;)

Now, here's something I don't usually talk about on my blog (if you thought from the above paragraph it was going to be sex-toys you can breathe a sigh of relief. It's not). It's something else that I can't believe has been headlining in our country for approx 18 days (give or take) now. The Spear. Now I don't discuss politics here (aside from the fact that if you are old enough, I think you should vote regardless of your political opinion) but this one has been dragging on for a while now and since the City Press and now the Goodman Gallery are apparently removing the picture of the painting from their websites, I wanted to put it on mine. You know, because that's how the internet works. Information is out there. You can't remove something from every nook & cranny of the internet.

And although I couldn't care less about the painting or what it is of, I believe that people should be allowed to express themselves in any way that doesn't harm another. This certainly isn't physical abuse. And although I believe emotional abuse is a serious thing and not to be taken lightly, I don't think one random act or an opinion by a total stranger constitutes emotional harm. Yes, you might not like what someone says about you or what they think of you, but no one ever said everyone was going to like you or agree with you all the time and, this is the important bit here, they should be allowed not to and to have their differing opinion.

The best article I've read on this whole debacle was by Jonathan Jansen. I guess I could've understood if JZ had gone to the artist as an individual and said "Listen, dude, that painting, it was in poor taste and I am kinda offended and I'd appreciate if you didn't display it" ... but I guess that would only really work if he was an ordinary citizen. Because as someone like the president or a celebrity, you do rather become public property. I mean the painting would never have been made if the guy in it was Joe Soap off the street (because there'd be no context and I do believe that the painting is making a statement about JZ, and one that I think is actually appropriate considering his multiple wives & sexual scandals) ... but, sadly, I also imagine that if it had been Joe Soap, there would still be no court case defending that person's rights or dignity and no marching in protest by the masses. See, now that's a double standard and that's only a part of where I think we've gone wrong.

I am also curious about what would've happened if this painting had been held back and only released by the artist in years to come, after Zuma had died and was merely and ex-South African president. Would anyone have cared about his dignity then?

I have another question too. What would they have done if someone (any takers) arranged an online flash mob where everyone around the world could make their own Zuma-and-his-penis-picture and all uploaded it to the same place (or probably rather, multiple places). How would the masses have reacted then? Where would they march? What court would be able to control that?


I think that the offended public & JZ could happily have taken this up with just the City Press for their role in making a painting, that was quite content to be hidden away in a gallery, seen by maybe a few hundred people out of South Africa's 48 million (as per wikipedia stats), very public. Now that I would've been okay with. But to attack the artist and the gallery displaying it seems crazy to me. I suspect that even if it was a front page City Press article, but didn't have a picture of the painting this whole uproar wouldn't have happened either ...

The people seeing the bigger picture know that all this has done is make this the most famous painting in South Africa and put Brett Murray's name on the map (remember it because I am sure he'll be in future editions of Trivial Pursuit). No one is going to unsee the image now that it's been removed from 2 websites and a gallery and even defaced. A quick search on google and wikipedia will provide you with a copy. Nothing here has been gained.

Anyway, I think there are so many things wrong with the weeks-long arguing that has gone on around this painting so I just wanted to put it up here, on my little piece of the internet. To prove a point about how the internet works.

The Devotion of Suspect X by Keigo Higashino

Yasuko lives a quiet life, working in a Tokyo bento shop, a good mother to her only child. But when her ex-husband appears at her door without warning one day, her comfortable world is shattered. When Detective Kusanagi of the Tokyo Police tries to piece together the events of that day, he finds himself confronted by the most puzzling, mysterious circumstances he has ever investigated. Nothing quite makes sense, and it will take a genius to understand the genius behind this particular crime...One of the biggest-selling Japanese thrillers ever, and the inspiration for a cult film, The Devotion of Suspect X is now being discovered across the world. Its blend of a page-turning story, evocative Tokyo setting and utterly surprising ending make it a must-read for anyone interested in international fiction.

Okay so although this does fall into the murder/crime genre, I'd say it was an interesting choice for me ... I don't think I've read any Japanese fiction before. And it was good. It takes a little while as you stumble over the foreign names (I always take longer to remember who is who when the characters have foreign names that don't stick as easily in my head, perhaps it is a pronunciation thing?). And the story is a little slow going for a while there. But sheesh, I did not see the twist coming. I really quite liked it.

Meh

Righto, well, I'm still sick. Not as sick as The Trucker tho. And I probably could've done with a day off work to spend in bed .... but having been on training for the last 4 days of last week, the office already thinks I've been off since I haven't been around to do my normal work.

So here I am. Anyway, the weekend was okay. I'm a bit blue this morning so excuse the lack of enthusiasm.

On Friday evening The Trucker & I headed to Schwabing for one of his friend's birthdays. I dunno why everyone loves the place. I find it decidedly average and don't know that I would ever go back if people didn't keep arranging things there. Guess it's all about the boy-sized schnitzels and beer. But it is nice enough I guess if you have a large group. Anyway, neither of us was feeling 100% and we left at about 21h30. I will say I was super grateful for the Gluhwein I was drinking :)

On Saturday we did some admin - I've decided I need to fence the bunnies off the non-grass bits of the garden for winter because they are chewing thru the plants at an alarming rate and the plants just can't keep up. Sadly this hasn't worked out very well because Coal & Lily have already managed to get themselves under the fence but then can't get out again and I have to chase them around till I can catch them. Which doesn't make them love me very much at all :(

We spent Saturday afternoon very quietly on the couch watching Get Him to the Greek. Apparently not knowing the Stroke the Furry Wall song was a gaping hole in my life experience ;) Pretty mindless entertainment, just what we needed!

On Saturday evening we headed thru to Pretoria to try out a Turkish restaurant called Ala Turka with @Toxic_Mouse & his girlf. Dreadful website: you have to click on (apparently not the food) menu to get to the rest of the navigation and the sound re-switches back on on every new page. It was pretty cool. I really enjoy getting a vast selection of meze to share. But then I had no space for mains (luckily I had only ordered another meze dish). The entertainment was okay, there were 2 Belly Dancers dancing with fire & swords. It's a bit difficult for them to navigate all the tables, I guess. And the bill was astronomical for a table for 4. Worth the experience, but I doubt we'll be trekking all the way back there again.

On Sunday we had a quick breakfast at home and then The Trucker went off to cricket (he shouldn't have) and I went shopping. I have decided to split my house stuffs into bite-sized chunks. At the moment on my list is my main bedroom so I was off hunting for light fittings. Went to a bazillion shops and couldn't find what I wanted - sigh. And then I went grocery shopping because I was in the mood to try out my old bread recipe which I haven't made in years (tis the season to dunk bread in soup, you know) and I planned to try out Mac n Cheese in my new slow-cooker.

We had a very lazy Sunday afternoon, The Trucker slept for most of it. We finished off the last ever episodes of House and ate my Mac n Cheese. Hmmm, it's not saucy like usual but the flavour was spot on. May require further experimentation.