Thursday, May 24, 2007

Brief Aside

So, while I'm supposed to be away on this course, a course that takes you away from the daily stress of your work environment and the traffic as well as the distraction (?) of your friends and family and has really done everything in it's power to ensure you build new networks and can concentrate entirely on all the good things they have to impart, I have my life poking it's nose in.

For those of you who have been watching series after series of the Varen & Philly show, it has now come to a rather definite but abrupt close. Yes, I know you all thought that happened on Sunday, and to all intents and purposes it did. But to my surprise, we still were in contact ... not immense contact, no emails and only a very rare and functional sms but messaging on facebook every so often none the less.

And this afternoon, while I was in a class none the less, I got a simple (and functional) sms that merely said "I'm sorry. Bye." Hmmm, this got me thinking ... what could this mean, coming completely out of the blue?

Apparently we're over, not friends, not aquaintances, nothing, over. According to his explanatory email that I've just managed to get to read: "i've resigned from facebook, removed you off my blog, deleted you from my googletalk authorisations etc etc." That is how over we are.

I
still don't quite know why or what I did that caused this all of a sudden, much the same as I still am not sure what triggered this entire downward spiral in our relationship on Sunday either. Obviously in my absence he has figured out all sorts of things that he couldn't while I was around (which was just as much his fault as mine).

That, or he's found someone else and can't just tell me that since he was the one supposed to be more invested in this, how would it look if he were the first to move on and so quickly? Anyway, who knows ... I doubt I ever will. But certainly after his abrupt manner in handling this situation (which is obviously how he needed to do it to ensure he would), I am not inclined to be interested in any of the reasons.

It's over. We won't be speaking again, no doubt ever (we're both stubborn like that). It's sad and I wish I'd known that the last time I saw him was going to actually be the last. There's not much more I can say, but it has certainly put a damper on my mood today ... which was mostly boredom as we spent the day on Strategy. But still, it's not a nice way to receive bad news and I don't really have anyone here to share my emotions with (we're not all that close yet). So here I am finding an outlet for the upheaval in my life and the inability to act on any of it by writing it all down.

No doubt he won't be reading anymore anyway :P

6 comments:

Nico van Rensburg said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
phillygirl said...

It has been accepted.

phillygirl said...

There you have it folks. Post removing himself from my life and me from his, Varen commented on my blog post detailing the event.

I decided against removing the comment myself as I don't really feel that's fair to the medium and if that's how he chose to communicate, I'd leave it there for all to see. I merely responded in a curt and as un-involved manner as possible (as seems to have been requested from me in my future interactions with him, of which there should've been none).

As you can clearly see, he deleted his comment.

Such is life.

francesca said...

dear philly girl, aw, there'll always be another guy to have fun and explore things with. i've experienced abrupt disappearances a few times and am learning how to simply let go. besides, what i've learned is ... well, i've learned how important it is to enjoy my own company. it's taking some getting used to, but i'm beginning to get the knack of it and it's beginning to be lots of fun. sf

francesca said...

p.s. i'm really glad to be a girl too.

phillygirl said...

@sarah - thanks for the kind words of encouragement and I know you are right :) Here's holding thumbs for the future !

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