Monday, January 18, 2010


Shoo, what a weekend.

I spent a very quiet Friday night home alone in my new place. It may sound sad to you, but generally my stay-home nights have been Mondays and Fridays. I enjoyed this one, I was completely relaxed and finished my book and watched some Californication.

It's that sense of peace that I can't really get over. I knew my life wouldn't change that much going from dating Varen to being single since he was barely ever home when I was, but there is a peace that comes from not waiting for someone to come home or wondering when they will get there (or what I should've been wondering: what they were actually doing at work till so late!).

Saturday was a bit of a mess, emotionally and practically. I'd tried to organise in advance the collection of the last of my things from Varen's house ... my only condition was that his new girlf not be around (not even hidden upstairs in the bedroom) while I was there. Seemed reasonable enough to me. From the many smses backwards and forwards on Saturday morning, the plan changed many times (and highlighted one of my least favourite things about Varen ... his inability to actually do what he says he's going to). From offering to help me move the stuff on Friday to asking me to change it to Sunday to saying he'd be there while I was there to saying he and the new girlf had gone out and left the key for me (and this was all before midday on Saturday! Sheesh)

So I started my day with moving my gym membership (so far I don't like the look of my new Curves, but there's no way I can be driving all the way to the old one just for a nicer gym-environment!) and then headed off to Bokkie's place (he had kindly agreed to help me move everything with his bakkie). We tried to get the rest of the bunny-fencing (two places had no stock of what I needed :P) and a hay-bale (also no stock!!) ... as you can imagine, I was not having a great morning.

But things did perk up when I collected the last of my stuff from Varen's house. He wasn't there and I do think that was better. I now never have to have anything to do with him again and he can continue his new life with his new girlf far far away from me :) I can't quite explain the relief at moving the last of my stuff and knowing there's no longer any reason to speak to him again.

Something else I realised was that I haven't once felt the pain I felt when I left Bean ... the pain of going thru a break-up and losing your home, your safe place in the world. I didn't lose my home, Varen's place clearly never felt like home ... or rather all the things that made it home for me have come with me. It's now an empty shell of it's former self. The fridge was empty, the curtains weren't open, there was no loo paper in any of the loo's, there were cigarette butts in the garden :P I realise now that although he owned the place, he never really "lived" there, it was a place to sleep when he wasn't at work and that is all. There are many many things I'm not missing!

After that, Bokkie and I did some price comparisons and I swiped my card and bought my new Fridge, Microwave and Washing Machine (mine was cheaper than the site lists) ... all for about R6500 from HiFi Corporation, which I didn't think was too bad at all :) My new Microwave has successfully been installed (plugged in) and the other two are arriving tomorrow. I can not wait!

I ended the day at Cool Runnings in 4ways for @pixitea's birthday. It was a marathon day but I really felt a sense of achievement at the end of it. On Sunday I went and did some more house-shopping, am buying a few of the basics here and there and scouted out the couch I have my eye on :) Mostly tho I just took a lot of measurements and bought myself some crockery - pretty useless right now since I still have no cutlery ;)

And then it was off to Shul in Pretoria for my very first Orthodox Jewish Engagement Party :) Jees but there were millions of people and masses of food!

Oh yes, Sunday was also a year since I got Little Lily :) And it was Varen's birthday. Wow, how much has changed in just the last year? His folks are no longer together, he & I are no longer together (and both him & his folks have all found replacement relationships already ... the new girlf got to meet the fandamily yesterday at his birthday lunch. From my perspective, his life doesn't seem to have changed much, he just seems to be doing all the same things with a different person) and BrotherSwoop and his girlf broke up too. It's funny looking at a photo we took on his birthday last year when I made a massive champagne breakfast for his whole family.

Me tho, I have that tingly feeling telling me 2010 is going to be a good year, a fun year and definitely a better year than last year was.


Tara said...

Yay! It's amazing how exciting new appliances can be :) Everytime I've gotten any of mine, I've sat and read all the documentation because, omg, I'm all grown up now ;P

Glad you're not feeling much/any pain from the Varen thing. Although I'm so confused at how quickly the new chick is integrated into his life but eh, we're all different.

Tamara said...

So exciting to have shiny new furniture of your own arriving!

Sorry that Varen was being difficult on Sat. Glad that the weekend improved after that.

I can't believe it's already a year since you got beautiful little Lily!

The Divine Miss M said...

I think 2010 is going to be fantastic year for you!

And for me.

So for us ;)

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