Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Taking it Online

Wow, apparently yesterday was post *1000*, which I know is not exactly true because some posts have never been published. But still, they've been written. Not a bad achievement, if I do say so myself.

Anyway, enough with the faux celebrations, after yesterdays post, I found myself weighing up the idea of internet dating ... after making myself a delicious salad for dinner - I know, who is this person?! But I had sort of intended to go to gym, I kinda sorta intend going almost everyday, but somehow I never quite get there. Exercise doesn't excite me. So I figured the next best thing I can do is make healthy dinners, instead of comfort-in-this-cold-weather food like pastas. My salad was quite delish honestly (and I'll admit I don't usually make salad because I find them about as boring as gym, but they can definitely be made more interesting, which is what I did). I used a base of Rocket leaves and added some Roast Veggies and chopped mini sweet-corn. Threw on some Danish Feta (soft feta is sooo much better imho), avocado, cashew nuts and topped it off with moist sliced biltong. Yay, I can't wait for the left-overs for lunch :) I will admit that I did originally intend to add some cooked pasta & pesto, but completely forgot. Next time :)

Right, back to the internet dating. So I had been saying for a while that along with trying out speed dating, I'd give the online dating scene a bash. I mean, I've never done either of those things before and hey, when you're single at 30, I figure they're worth experimenting with :) I put it off blaming my no-internet-at-home, but since I've had internet in the privacy of my own home for about a month now and yesterday's post really triggered a nerve with me about being proactive, I started to browse.

Let me say upfront, browsing is pretty much useless. They tell you it's free and all that but most sites (and a lot of them seem to be the same site "under the hood") show you about 5 profiles and then make you sign up. Fair enough, it's free to sign up. So I bit the bullet and registered. Sheesh but it's hard when you have to start describing why someone should date you. Me, I like those easy to answer drop-down boxes. But I got it all filled in ... despite still desperately wishing for a "disable" button. You know, I don't want to delete my profile, but I was kinda hoping it wouldn't go public just yet ... But I can update it as I go and as I figure out what other people are saying and what I'm reading that works for me. So I did it. And I've made some tweaks this morning already. Haha.

I'm still completely terrified tho. And I've been trying to work out what terrifies me exactly. I mean yes some of my friends have hysterical and horror stories about meeting people online. But I know many others who have met their life partners too. I was able to sum up part of the problem almost immediately when I was browsing thru the men the site decided were "matches" for me and found 2 boys that I recognised from their photographs. That terrifies me. People I know finding me. And that just sounds silly, because where is the shame in internet dating, most people have at least tried it. And hello, I'm single at 30, I'm meeting people where I can.

The other part that troubles me is that I am a very online person (which is why I would've thought I'd be more comfortable with this whole thing honestly) but, my online person and my real person are not the same, I mean they are in terms of what I write, but I'm still not using my real name here, you know? I can't figure out quite why I'd rather that any potential people weren't actually reading my blog or twitter feed, perhaps because of what I may say about them and also because it does give them the upper hand (I don't need another person trying to fake their way into a relationship with me :P)

So yeah, so far this morning I've already blocked 2 people who "favourited" me. What fascinates me is that it tells you how well you match and dude, seriously, even if I'm a 99% match for you, if you're a less than 45% match for me, there is *no* chance. Mkay, honestly tho, if you're a less than 80% match for me there is probably no chance. Haha, just after pressing publish on this I got my first message from someone. And what's the first thing I notice (which he clearly didn't ?!?) is "He isn't a match for you because of several incompatibilities". Erm then why is he bothering. Is this just a numbers game for some people?

Last question: "How honest have you been in your profile?" ... really, why would people start telling the truth now?less than a minute ago via Seesmic

Oh, and ps. that awesome tweet-box above was made with Blackbird Pie.


Janine / Being Brazen said...

Good luck with the online thing.


I tries to get my mom to online date, but eventually she settled on one of those match making services - where you set up coffee dates or whatever. Seemed to work well.


Anonymous said...

And those people "favouriting" you, and sending you messages despite the lack of "compatability", are the ones who put me off internet dating. I bought myself a subscription to 5FM's site twice, and both times I got so annoyed I cancelled them waaay before my time was up.

Caz said...

Well I am pretty sure that either way you will have some great stories from this! :)

Have a great day lady

Tamara said...

Sounds like great blogging material ;-)

Anonymous said...

See, here's my problem with Internet dating. The first guy I fell for, head over heels might I add, turned out to be a heroin/crack addict. The second one, turned out to be into S&M. I ran for the hills. Hope you have better luck, lol!

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